Thursday, March 19, 2009

Target Hates Me....


I swore I would never do this. I can't believe I do it now. I am red faced, ashamed.

My confession...I literally destroyed Target today.

Back over 100 years ago (or so it feels) pre-kids I used to work retail. A few small, super trendy (expensive) little Newport Beach Boutiques. Fancy Schmancy huh? Not really. Moms with strollers make a mess. A disgusting, horrible, "What is the Matter with you?", mess. Crackers all over the floor, clothes pulled down, clothing piled inside out on the floor of the dressing room, dirty diapers in the corner (yes, it happened to me), sticky finger smears everywhere, and much, much more.

I would exclaim: "What is the MATTER with these people?", "This is DISGUSTING!" , and my favorite..."I would NEVER do something like that."

Fast forward to present day. In Target. Destroyed. By me.

It all begain innocently enough. Got the twins popcorn, peanut butter sandwich, and juice. Figure all that food will buy me some time to shop. Within 8 minutes the peanut butter is smeared everywhere, juice is dripping from the cart, and we have left a popcorn trail that would make Hansel and Gretel jealous.

I have no option but to start stashing dirty napkins, wrappers, and peanut butter smeared merchandise all over their shelves. My little girl sat on the remainder of her sandwich so I attempted to "cram" it in the corner of the isle. The twins are whining...I am panicking that the security cameras are picking all this up....the stress was enormous. I was a criminal. I was "THAT" person. That person I swore I would never be..... :(


What is your messiest story?

13 comments:

  1. Oh, how embarrassing! I am not even sure of my worst story, but I have had many like this with the kids. I try to shop when they're in school now.

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  2. I forgot to mention that I would just like to apologize right now to any and every Target employee that may read this!

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  3. I have TOTALLY been there. We were in Kroger the day before Valentine's Day getting the hubby a card and a few things for dinner. I went in prepared; juice, raisins, etc. 15 minutes later, I my kids are s-r-e-a-m-i-n-g, there are chocolate cookies everywhere and four balloons on the ceiling. It was horrible. I was mortified.

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  4. Oh yes... I use to have "I'd spank that kid" moments until I actually HAD a baby. I remember this lady yelling at me because my 3 month old was crying on a plane. NOT nice ;)

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  5. LOL, this is somewhat similar as my son got physically sick in Target last month. I was so mad too because I went to the bathroom to try and clean him and whatever else up and NO paper towels, all they had were those hand blowers. Crazy.

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  6. Hi there- I found you via the etsy forums.
    This is one funny post:).I think a lot of Moms have 'been there'.
    Andrea

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  7. oh my gosh, I love your blog. Great color palette and title.

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  8. Your son picking his nose on the side of your blog is hilarious! LOL! I'm trying to think of a messy "out-in-public" story about my kids but I can't think of one! That doesn't mean it never happened. =)

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  9. Wow! I'm sure every mother can empathize! Thanks for sharing...great for a laugh. :D (laughing with you, not at you, of course. )
    yarnlovertn.etsy.com

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  10. Funny! Well, mine are now 20 and 23, so the stories aren't all that fresh in my mind, but I'm sure I've been there... probably in both places.

    Oh wait -- I'm remembering a prune juice story when my son was about 18 mos while in Disneyland with horrible consequences -- and I mean horrible!!! I won't go into details, but I think you get the picture. Only thing I can say is that with prune juice and kids, a dab will do ya.

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  11. Hee Hee, just discovered your blog. Weellll, my son peed on the floor in Sears once. Don't go out in public when you've just started potty training unless you put a pull-up over their underpants.

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  12. Ahhh lowellandson...live and learn right?! That's funny.

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  13. I think we've all been there! That description was great! Thanks for making me laugh out loud!

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